PRICE 25 CENTS 




Successful Rural Plays 

A Strong List From Which to Select Your 
Next Play 

FARM FOLKS. A Rural Play in Four Acts, by Arthur 
Lewis Tubbs. For five male and six female characters. Time 
of playing, two hours and a half. One simple exterior, two 
easy interior scenes. Costumes, modern. Flora Goodwin, a 
farmer's daughter, is engaged to Philip Burleigh, a young New 
Yorker. Philip's mother wants him to marry a society woman, 
and by falsehoods makes Flora believe Philip does not love her. 
Dave Weston, who wants Flora himself, helps the deception by 
intercepting a letter from Philip to Flora. She agrees to marry 
Dave, but on the eve of their marriage Dave confesses, Philip 
learns the truth, and he and Flora are reunited. It is a simple 
plot, but full of speeches and situations that sway an audience 
alternately to tears and to laughter. 

HOME TIES. A Rural Play in Four Acts, by Arthur 
Lewis Tubbs. Characters, four male, five female. Plays two 
hours and a half. Scene, a simple interior — same for all four 
acts. Costumes, modern. One of the strongest plays Mr. Tubbs 
has written. Martin Winn's wife left him when his daughter 
Ruth was a baby. Harold Vincent, the nephew and adopted son 
of the man who has wronged Martin, makes love to Ruth Winn. 
She is also loved by Len Everett, a prosperous young farmer. 
When Martin discovers who Harold is, he orders him to leave 
Ruth. Harold, who does not love sincerely, yields. Ruth dis- 
covers she loves Len, but thinks she has lost him also. Then 
he comes back, and Ruth finds her happiness. 

THE OLD NEW HAMPSHIRE HOME. A New 

England Drama in Three Acts, by Frank Dumont. For seven 
males and four females. Time, two hours and a half. Costumes, 
modern. A play with a strong heart interest and pathos, yet rich 
in humor. Easy to act and very effective. A rural drama of 
the "Old Homstead" and "Way Down East" type. Two ex- 
terior scenes, one interior, all easy to set. Full of strong sit- 
uations and delightfully humorous passages. The kind of a play 
everybody understands and likes. 

THE OLD DAIRY HOMESTEAD. A Rural Comedy 
in Three Acts, by Frank Dumont. For five males and four 
females. Time, two hours. Rural costumes. Scenes rural ex- 
terior and interior. An adventurer obtains a large sum of money 
from a farm house through the intimidation of the farmer's 
niece, whose husband he claims to be. Her escapes from the 
wiles of the villain and his female accomplice are both starting, 
and novel. 

A WHITE MOUNTAIN BOY. A Strong Melodrama in 
Five Acts, by Charles Townsend. For seven males and four 
females, and three supers. Time, two hours and twenty minutes. 
One exterior, three interiors. Costumes easy. The hero, a 
country lad, twice saves the life of a banker's daughter, which 
results in their betrothal. A scoundrelly clerk has the banker 
in his power, but the White Mountain boy finds a way to check- 
mate his schemes, saves the banker, and wins the girl. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



The Merediths Entertain 



By 
WHITNEY DARROW 




PHILADELPHIA 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

1922 






Copyright 1922 by The Penn Publishing Company 



The Merediths Entertaiu 



©CI.D 63259 



JAN < 1323 



~+-%\ 



i 






The Merediths Entertain 



CAST OF CHARACTERS 

Leonard Meredith, 

A New York editor and seldom serious 
Genevieve Meredith, 

His young wife, anxious to do things correctly 
Mrs. Warren, 

Mr. Meredith's elderly Aunt Maria who makes 
her home with the Merediths 

Mary A maid who came well recommended 

Frank Griswold, 

Another suburbanite, who comes to call on the 
newcomers with 
Alice Griswold His wife 



COSTUMES 

Leonard Meredith. Evening dress. 

Genevieve Meredith. Evening dress. 

Mrs. Warren. Plain dress with shawl. 

Mary. Dark dress, cap and apron. 

Frank Griswold. Business suit. 

Alice Griswold. Silk or cloth afternoon dress. 



PROPERTIES 



Scarf for Mrs. Meredith; cigarettes for Leonard; 
wraps for Mr. and Mrs. Griswold ; pack of cards ; 
coffee, sandwiches and cakes on table at opening of 
second scene ; tray, decanter and glasses for Leonard ; 
money for Leonard ; hat and coat for Mary. 



NOTICE TO PROFESSIONALS 

This play is published for the free use of strictly 
amateur companies only. Professional actors or or- 
ganizations wishing to produce it, in any form or 
under any title, are forbidden to do so without the 
consent of the author, who may be addressed in care 
of the publishers. 



The Merediths Entertain 



SCENE. The living-room in the Merediths' home. 

Time, a zveek day winter evening. 

(It is the usual living-room of a suburban home. Up 
center is the door from the front porch and at the 
left are stairs leading to the upper floor. Beneath 
these are the stairs to the cellar zvith a door opening 
to them. At the opposite end of the room is a door 
leading to the dining-room and kitchen. The room 
is furnished zvith a center table and comfortable 
chairs. At the right center is a card table and four 
straight chairs. By the outside door is a mirror and 
on the center table are books and a lighted lamp 
and beside it a vase of roses. In the corner is a 
couch. The clock shows 8:13.) 

(As the curtain rises Mrs. Meredith is discovered in 
evening dress with a scarf about her shoulders. < She 
is pacing back and forth, now and then impatiently 
rearranging the flowers or straightening the books 
on the table. She goes to cellar door and opens it 
and calls.) 

Mrs. Meredith. Leonard! Leonard! I am as 

cold as . 

Mr. Meredith (voice heard from down-stairs). 
Hell-o, Genevieve, did you call me? 

Mrs. M. (stamping her foot). I most certainly did. 
There isn't a particle of heat in the registers. 

Mr. M. How could there be? There isn't any in 
the furnace. 



6 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

Mrs. M. Do you mean to say you aren't going to 
have any ? 

Mr. M. I have ordered some, but it hasn't arrived 
yet. 

Mrs. M. Well, it would better. The Griswolds 
will arrive soon and we've got to have some heat. 

Mr. M. Then why don't you come down and talk 
in your appealing way to the furnace ? Just pat it and 
it may burn for you. 

Mrs. M. {takes chair by center table and picks up a 
book). You will never talk sense. You will, for once, 
if the Griswolds leave because of our cold house. 

Mr. M. (appears in evening clothes and stands with 
outstretched arms. He is covered zvith dust and his 
hands and face are streaked with black). I have it 
started but how can I get it going in half an hour when 
it hasn't had coal on it since morning? 

Mrs. M. (lays book down, gets up and walks back 
and forth). That's right, blame it on me, of course. 
I am so cold I can't sit down and be comfortable. 

Mr. M. (walking over to his wife and patting her 
bare arms). Then why not put on some clothes? 

Mrs. M. I just try to look well. You know people 
here dress for dinner. 

Mr. M. How do you know that when we have just 
come here and the nearest we have come to an invita- 
tion is to have a chance to buy tickets at five per for 
the Hospital Ball? 

Mrs. M. I know very well they dress and the Gris- 
wolds will wear evening clothes and if we didn't, think 
how we would feel ! 

Mr. M. (lighting a cigarette). Quite comfortable, 
if you ask me. 

Mrs. M. What I do ask is for you to look at your- 
self. 

Mr. M. (goes over to mirror and stands before il 
making faces and waving his arms in pretended 
horror). There is black on my hands, there is black 
on my face and with just a bit more 

Mrs. M. (disgustedly). Well? 



THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 7 

Mr. M. (quickly). I'd make a good colored butler. 
(Turning to Mrs. Meredith.) My dear, you are too 
quick on the trigger. I could have made a fine last 
line to an otherwise perfect verse. 

Mrs. M. Leonard, be serious for a minute. 

Mr. M. My dear, I am so serious it hurts. 

Mrs. M. In ten minutes the Griswolds will be here. 
The maid is in the kitchen. 

Mr. M. (singing). And the cows are in the corn. 

Mrs. M. You're acting awfully foolish. 

Mr. M. It's because you're so forlorn. How's that 
for fine verse? Never even thought it out. 

Mrs. M. You have nerve to try it even on your 
wife in the privacy of our own home. It's worse than 
this terrible maid could do. 

Mr. M. So you finally got a maid? 

Mrs. M. (talking very fast). Yes. I repeat the 
maid is in the kitchen, and don't you dare to make 
another awful rhyme. Just because you are an editor, 
don't think you are an author; and as for being a 
poet 

Mr. M. Wheal (Crosses heart.) I promise. 
Where did you get her? 

Mrs. M. I called up Nancy Perkins and she said 
to call up the Home Employment Agency. 

Mr. M. And they said to call up? 

Mrs. M. No. They said they had several girls on 
their list. Ambitious girls who have regular positions 
but who go out on their off nights to make extra 
money. They sent this girl. Her name is Mary. 

Mr. M. I hope this isn't one of her off nights. 

Mrs. M. I hope it is, because I have sympathy for 
whoever has to have her regularly. 

Mr. M. And so have I, at what maids cost these 
days. 

Mrs. M. Not that. But she's horribly ignorant. 

Mr. M. (feigning astonishment). You certainly 
don't mean to say she hasn't a college education ! 

Mrs. M. Her language and her manners are 
atrocious. 



8 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

Mr. M. Shocking! 

Mrs. M. No, I don't mean what you mean. We 
are in a bad dilemma. We mustn't let the Griswolds 
know we have no regular maid, and I hate to think of 
their imagining we couldn't train an animal to have 
better manners than Mary. 

Mr. M. Now we are in this thing we must make 
the best of it. From the start it is nothing but foolish- 
ness. I don't believe in pretending to have something 
one hasn't. Aunt Maria feels just as I do about it. 

Mrs. M. Of course Aunt Maria does. She thinks 
everything I do is foolish. My doing it makes it fool- 
ish. And, by the way, I do hope she doesn't come 
down this evening. 

Mr. M. She won't be down. She can't hear much 
and she wouldn't enjoy it. 

Mrs. M. She would enjoy it if she thought I didn't 
want her. 

Mary [opens door of dining-room and peers around 
it). Say, Mrs. Meredith, I can't find them there cakes 
you said you bought off the baker. 

Mrs. M. The cakes, Mary, are in a box on the 
pantry shelf. Now please put your apron on and be 
ready to go to the door when our guests come. You 
know what to say when they arrive? 

Mary. Yes, ma'am. I'll just say your husband 
went up-stairs to wash and will be down in a minute. 

Mrs. M. Mary, I told you to say " If you will have 
chairs, I will tell Mr. and Mrs. Meredith you are 
here." Say that, please, and nothing more. Now go 
and put your apron on, (Exit Mary.) 

Mr. M. (sits on arm of chair). Some maid! 
Where do they come from? She acts like the home- 
made variety. 

Mrs. M. The agency said she was one of the best 
maids on their list, and they furnish extra help con- 
stantly. 

Mr'. M. They won't to us. 

Mrs. M. I wouldn't mind if it were someone else 
than the Griswolds ; it's their first call. I do hope she 



THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 9 

won't do anything really awful. Still, everyone has 
trouble keeping maids. Mrs. Griswold said over the 
'phone she really shouldn't come to-night herself be- 
cause it was her maid's night out and the cook ob- 
jected to staying alone, but she was afraid to tell her 
maid to change her night because it was so hard to 
keep any kind of help. 

Mr. M. (getting up). I am going up-stairs to get 
some of this black off. 

Mrs. M. (follows him). And I am going up to see 
that you get it all off. Do you know in some ways 
you are just like an overgrown boy? 

(Both exit left.) 

Mrs. Warren (enters from left with a heavy, 
colored shawl wrapped around her. Goes to each 
register holding her hands over it and is heard mut- 
tering angrily to herself). This is as cold as Green- 
land's icy mountains. Roses on the table and no heat 
in the furnace. The way people live these days ! 
(Goes over to couch and prepares to lie down.) I'll 
rest here. Better than my room anyway. 

(Lies down and wraps shawl around her and covering 
even her face. Almost immediately she begins to 
snore louder and louder and finally after a partic- 
ularly loud snort she settles down to a quiet sleep. 
Door-bell is heard. ) 

Mary (enters from dining-room after cautiously 
peeking around the door as she always does before 
entering a room. Goes to mirror and fusses zvith her 
hair arid brushes her apron and then, giving her hair 
an extra pat, goes slowly to the door, opening it and 
standing back of it, only showing the visitors her 
head). Mrs. Griswold ! 

Mrs. Griswold (enters zvith Mr. Griswold. Both 
are in every-day clothes. Mary automatically takes 
their coats and lays them on a seat). Mary! What 
are you doing here ! Have you left us ? 



10 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

Mary (standing first on one foot and then on the 
other, the while playing with her apron). I never told 
you, but I am going to be married and I make extra 
money by going out for extra service on my off nights. 

Mr. Griswold. But how did the Merediths get 
you? (Mr. and Mrs. Griswold sit down.) 

Mary. I am registered with the Home Agency. 
Mrs. Meredith didn't say who was coming. I thought 
she was going to have some rich and important people 
for the evening and here it's only you. 

Mrs. G. Have you no manners at all? 

Mr. G. Alice, we must make the best of this and 
not embarrass Mrs. Meredith. Mary, don't tell them 
you work for us. You must pretend you don't know 
us. 

Mary (starts to go but turns back). Mr. Meredith 
said not to tell you, but I don't mind telling you he 
went up-stairs to wash his face. 

Mrs. G. Mary, you mustn't say such things. 

Mary. Well, then I hope he hasn't washed because 
I'd like for you to see him. Gosh, he must 'a' climbed 
into the furnace looking for the fire. He didn't find 
it, though. Your house was never as cold as this 
joint and I have seen it mighty cold there when Mr. 
Griswold 

Mrs. G. Keep still, Mary. Go at once and do as I 
told you. (Exit Mary.) 

Mr. G. Why under the sun do you keep that girl? 

Mrs. G. Where can I get another? Two of our 
friends have been without help of any sort for three 
months. 

Mr. G. To think that Mrs. Meredith tried to get 
away with a maid for a night just because we were 
coming over and stumbled onto ours. If Mary doesn't 
mess things in some way, I'll miss my guess. 

Mrs. G. If Mrs. Meredith ever finds out it will 
nearly kill her. She thinks so much of appearances. 

Mary (returns). Mr. Meredith is nearly washed, I 
mean they'll be right down. I didn't let on I worked 
for you. 



THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN II 

Mr. G. Just what did you say, Mary ? 

Mary, I only said, polite like, " Those Griswolds 
are down-stairs and want to see you," and what do 
you think Mr. Meredith had the nerve to do? 

Mr. G. I know what I would have done. 

Mary. He threw a shoe at me and said to Mrs. 
Meredith, " That's what you get for hiring a girl who 
doesn't know what it means to work in a respectable 
place." 

Mr. G. And you surely answered that ! 

Mary. Oh, of course. I said, " Yes, sir," and left. 
Here come the Merediths. I'll go and get the coffee 
ready. (Exit to dining-room.) 

Mrs. M. (enters with Mr. Meredith and all shake 
hands). How glad I am to see you, Mrs. Griswold, 
and you, Mr. Griswold. Won't you be seated? I do 
hope you will both pardon our delay, but Leonard had 
some important work to finish. 

Mr. G. I hope he got it off his hands. 

Mr. M. Yes, I just finished. Genevieve helped 
me and saved my face. 

Mrs. G. You see, wives are of some use to you 
business men after all. 

Mr. M. (feeling his face). Yes, but they don't have 
to rub it in. 

Mrs. Warren (stirs slightly and mumbles inco- 
herently, while all regard the couch speechless with 
surprise. Suddenly she jumps up from couch and 
sits up rubbing her eyes). Have I been asleep? Oh! 
The company's here. 

Mrs. M. (is as shocked at finding Mrs. Warren in 
the room as Mr. Meredith is amused. The men 
stand up and Mrs. Meredith addresses her in a loud 
voice). Aunt Maria, what are you doing here? I 
want to present Mrs. Griswold and Mr. Griswold, 
Leonard's Aunt Maria, Mrs. Warren. 

Mrs. Warren. You had a present from the Gris- 
wolds? That was real nice. What did they bring 
you? 

Mrs. M. (aside). Poor Aunt Maria is quite hard 



12 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

of hearing. (Then in louder voice.) I didn't say 
they brought a present. I was presenting, introducing 
them to you. 

Mrs. Warren. I'm glad to meet you, I'm sure. 
It's been a cold day, hasn't it ? 

Mr. M. (coming to the rescue). Don't you want 
me to help you up-stairs? 

Mrs. Warren. No. The help is in the kitchen. 
Jenny, what did you get that girl for anyhow? You 
are just going to have sandwiches, a few little cakes 
and some coffee. I could have helped you. Glad to 
have something to do. 

Mrs. M. You see, Aunt Maria hears so little she 
gets terribly mixed up and we don't try to straighten 
things out. It only makes things worse. 

Mr. M. If we will go over and start playing cards 
she will go up-stairs. 

Mrs. M. That's a good idea. Would you like to 
play? We can talk too. 

Mrs. G. (arising). We would enjoy it ever so 
much. We play so seldom we aren't very clever at it, 
though. 

Mrs. M. Oh, I am sure you play well but I will 
help you for a few hands. 

(The four cross to the card table and seat themselves. 
Mr. Griswold opposite Mrs. Meredith and Mrs. 
Griswold at his right and Mr. Meredith at his 
left.) 

Mrs. Warren (gets a chair and goes lo table). 
What are you going to play, cards? 

Mrs. M. We are going to play bridge. 

Mrs. Warren. Can five play that? 

Mr. M. No. Four play bridge. Do you want to 
stay and look on ? 

Mrs. Warren. Yes, I'd much rather play than look 
on. We can play five hundred. I like that. 

Mrs. M. Mr. and Mrs. Griswold haven't been here 
before and they like bridge best I'm sure. 



THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN IJ 

Mrs. Warren. All right, Jenny. You and I will 
take turns. 

Mr. M. Aunt Maria, to-night we four are going 
to play. I'm sure you are tired. 

Mary (again sticks her head around dining-room 
door). Do you want me to bring in the coffee now? 

Mrs. M. You don't mean to say you have made it 
already ? 

Mary. Didn't you say to make coffee? 

Mrs. M. Yes, but not until we are ready. Throw 
it out and you can make fresh coffee when I tell you. 
(Mary leaves. Mrs. Meredith turns to Mrs. Gris- 
wold.) I have never known her to do that before. 
Girls are so hard to get, I hate to say anything. I 
don't know where I could get another. You know 
how it is, Mrs. Griswold. 

Mrs. G. (amused). Oh, yes, I know better than 
you can possibly realize. 

Mrs. Warren. Is that the new maid you just hired 
for the 

Mrs. M. Aunt Maria, you know Mary of course. 

Mrs. Warren. Yes, I do think she is coarse. What 
kind of training can she have had? 

Mrs. M. Mrs. Griswold, that is so true. As I see 
different maids I wonder what the homes in which 
they have worked can be like. I know you appreciate 
this as few would. 

Mrs. G. I do know what it means, don't I, Frank? 

Mr. G. Yes, dear, we both appreciate it. 

Mr. M. But how about this bridge ? (Places cards 
before Mrs. Griswold.) Visiting lady deals. (Mrs. 
Griswold begins to deal.) 

Mary (opens door and looks at them for a few sec- 
onds then comes forward). Are you folks sitting at 
the table waiting for the sandwiches and coffee and 
cakes bought off the baker? 

Mr. M. Mary, will you kindly hide yourself in the 
kitchen until we call you ? 

Mary. Well, the Griswolds must be hungry. I 
know they didn't have much supper. 



14 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

Mr. M. Mary, you confirm my belief in the rights 
of capital punishment. Now get out and stay out. 

(This time Mary leaves.) 

Mrs. M. You can't imagine how embarrassed I 
am. I do hope you will excuse this as just one of the 
penalties of having maids these days. I wouldn't have 
any, but Leonard insists on it. 

Mr. M. Insists on what? 

Mrs. M. On my having some help. 

Mr. M. Yes, but help and maids to-day are not 
synonymous terms. 

Mr. G. It's your bid, Alice. , 

Mrs. G. Did I deal? Pass. 

Mr. G. One spade. 

Mr. M. Pass. 

Mrs. M. One heart. 

Mr. M. You'll have to say two hearts to beat one 
spade. 

Mrs. M. I can beat one spade with one heart. 

Mr. M. Not in bridge, you can't. 

Mrs. M. Well, I haven't bid yet and I only want to 
bid one heart. 

Mrs. G. You see, my dear, one spade counts nine 
and one heart only eight ; so to bid you will have to say 
two hearts. 

Mrs. M. Then I'll pass. 

Mr. M. But having now mentioned hearts you'll 
have to let it stand at two. You can't give your part- 
ner information and then not bid. 

Mrs. M. (very obviously peeved). All right then, 
two hearts. 

Mrs. G. Pass. 

Mr. G. Pass. 

Mr. M. I'll double two hearts. 

Mrs. M. So that's why you made me say two! 

Mr. M. No, it's just bridge. 

Mrs. M. Anyway I am glad Mr. Griswold has to 
play it. I am sure he can make it. 



THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 1$ 

Mr. G. No, you have to play the two hearts. I bid 
a spade. 

Mrs. M. But you bid first. 

Mr. G. But not hearts. 

Mrs. M. Some bridge rules seem so foolish. I 
like to play for relaxation and not to make a business 
out of it. If you have to think, there is no fun in it. 

Mr. M. That's why you always get so much fun 
out of it. 

Mrs. G. It's my lead. I'll lead the queen of clubs. 

Mrs. Warren (zvalks over and looks at Mrs. Gris- 
wold's hand). Why did you lead that when it's the 
only club you've got ? 

Mr. M. Ye gods and little fishes! What a night! 
Now I suppose it's Mary's turn. 

Mary. Did you call me ? 

Mr. M. Where were you? You have all the hear- 
ing Aunt Maria lacks with all your own besides. 

Mary. I was just listening at the door to be ready 
when you called me. 

Mr. M. This isn't a poker game and I am not call- 
ing you, so you needn't listen. {Gets up and bows 
with mock courtesy.) Good-evening, Mary. 

Mary (curtsies). Good-evening, Mr. Meredith. 

Mr. M. See here. This isn't a society dancing 
class. This is a very serious game of bridge and 
friends are requested to omit maids. Now will you 
kindly retire? 

Mary. Retire ? Am I expected to spend the night 
here? 

Mr. M. In words of one syllable. Go-out-in-the- 
kitchen - and - sit - down - there - in - a - chair - until- 
we-call-you. Now-go ! 

Mrs. G. I do hope you won't think we mind. It's 
only amusing. One has to be very philosophical to 
handle servants when few care whether they stay or 
not. 

Mary (returns somewhat scared). I can't sit down 
there in a chair. 

Mrs. M. Why not? 



l6 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

Mary. Because there isn't a chair in the kitchen. 

Mr. M. If I had any philosophy it's all gone. 
(Takes book from table and throws, but Mary has 
fortunately closed the door and the book slams against 
it.) What a night! 



curtain 



SCENE II 

(Curtain falls for two minutes, indicating lapse of two 
hours, during which the bridge game has proceeded 
much as it began. Mary has finally boiled the cof- 
fee and served the sandwiches and cakes and curtain 
rises with all at the table as before ; but on the table 
are the remains of the refreshments which Mary is 
starting to remove. Mrs. Warren has evidently 
finally gone to her room. The two men are lighting 
cigarettes. The clock shows eleven o'clock.) 

Mary (takes box of cigarettes and passes them to 
Mrs. Griswold). Aren't you going to smoke? 

Mrs. G. (evidently very much upset). Of course 
not. 

Mary. How was I to know you had given it up ? 

Mr. G. Mary, have you ever had your fortune 
told? 

Mary. No, but I've always wanted to. 

Mr. G. Let me have your hand. (Mary walks 
over and holds out her hand. Mr. Griswold exam- 
ines it critically for a minute and then looks up star- 
tled.) Mary, look at that line on your hand. 

Mary. And I just washed it. 

Mr. G. That line, Mary, says that you are going to 
take a journey. 

Mary. Soon ? 



THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN fj 

Mr. G. If you don't something terrible is going to 
happen. This journey will be the means of saving the 
lives of two people. 

Mary. Am I going to marry ? 

Mr. G. Yes, this line over here shows you will 
marry soon, but your husband is going to suffer ter- 
ribly. I rather think I see another journey for you. 

Mary. Will I be happy? 

Mr. G. You will be happier than if you don't take 
this first journey soon. 

Mary. Does my hand show all that ? 

Mr. G. Yes, and more, but I am keeping you from 
your work. 

(Mary picks up the sandwich plate and starts toward 
dining-room.) 

Mrs. Warren (appears wrapped in her shawl. She 
stops on seeing Mary). What are you taking the 
things off for? I haven't had anything to eat. 

Mrs. M. We thought you had gone to bed. 

Mrs. Warren. I was waiting for you to call me. 
Mary, you leave those things here. I'll sit down and 
get something anyway. 

(Mary puts down the plate and Mrs. Warren pulls a 
chair up to the table and starts to eat sandwiches 
and cake.) 

Mr. G. Mrs. Warren, you have an appetite, I 
think. 

Mrs. Warren. An appetite for drink? I'll have 
you Understand no one in our family ever drank — ex- 
cept, of course, we always had a little applejack ready 
in case of emergency. 

Mr. M. And emergencies frequently arose when I 
was around. 

Mrs. Warren. These sandwiches are really good. 

Mrs. M. There are a few things Mary can do. 

Mrs. Warren (ignorina her). Jenny made these 



l8 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

in such a hurry I didn't think they would be much 
good. 

Mrs. G. {gets up and starts to put on wraps). We 
really must be going. It's after eleven and Frank has 
to take the early train to town. 

Mr. G. (taking his hat and coat). You must both 
come over to see us soon. We have so many things in 
common. 

Mrs. M. You mean in liking to play bridge just for 
the fun of it? 

Mr. G. Yes, we have that in common and also er — 
er other things. 

Mrs. G. (shaking hands with Mrs. Meredith). 
We have had such a nice evening. 

Mrs. M. I do hope you will forget all about this 
horrible maid and all she has said and done. I will 
surely get rid of her at once, even if I can't get an- 
other. 

Mrs. G. I am sure you won't keep her. I wouldn't 
myself under the circumstances. 

Mr. G. Such things only add spice to life. I have 
been much amused. Mary would make a good char- 
acter for one of the comedies you write. 

Mr. M. She certainly would, but I don't see any 
climax at present. You can't have a comedy with just 
dialogue. It's got to lead to a situation. 

Mr. G. I am sure that in the end you'll find one. 
Think it over. Don't forget we will expect you soon 
at our place. Good-night. 

(Both have been putting on their things and now 
leave. ) 

Mr. M. (Mrs. Meredith has sunk into a chair by 
the table. Mr. Meredith goes to table for a ciga- 
rette). I told you what we would get into, trying 
to show off by having a maid and trying to impress 
them with things we haven't. This has been a terrible 
evening and I can't stand it any longer. I am going to 
take a drink whether you like it or not. My nerves 
are shattered. 



THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 19 

(Goes into dining-room and returns with tray and de- 
canter and puts it on the card table.) 

Mary (enters dressed for the street) , Is there 
anything else you want of me ? 

Mr. M. Nothing except a framed copy of your 
resignation. 

Mrs. M. Give her five dollars, Leonard. 

Mr. M. Here's the five, Mary, to go toward that 
wedding outfit. I only hope the fellow you are to 
marry isn't a night watchman. 

Mary. Why ? 

Mr. M. So he won't have to be home with you all 
day. 

Mrs. M. (getting up). Mary, I know it isn't your 
fault. You probably haven't been fortunate in getting 
into a good place to work. You must try to learn bet- 
ter manners. Why don't you try to get with some 
lady who will be a good influence and who will help 
you? 

Mary. Thank you, Mrs. Meredith. Can I tell her 
you said I better change to some one with better man- 
ners ? 

Mrs. M. Tell who? 

Mary. The lady I work for. 

Mrs. M. But I don't even know her. 

Mary. Well, I don't suppose you can know anyone 
really when you've only spent one evening with her. 

Mrs. M. What are you talking about? 

Mary (goes to door and opens it). I'm going now, 
so I guess it won't hurt no one. For two months I 
have been Mrs. Griswold's maid. Good-night. 

(Goes out and slants door.) 

Mr. M. Good-night. (Mr. and Mrs. Meredith 
just stand and stare at each other and then break out 
laughing.) Griswold said this would make a good 
story. The situation for the climax, though, isn't the 
one I would have chosen. 

Mrs. M. Leonard, I guess you were right, as usual, 



20 THE MEREDITHS ENTERTAIN 

We shouldn't have tried to get away with it. But it's 
that terrible it's ridiculous. 

Mr. M. What is there to do? 

Mrs. M. I guess this is what Aunt Maria would 
call an emergency. When you pour out your apple- 
jack, this time make it two. 

(Mr. Meredith takes two water glasses from the 
table and pours. Mrs. Warren, still eating cake, 
looks up and wipes her mouth.) 

Mrs. Warren. I couldn't hear all you said, but if 
it's a very real emergency, Leonard {holding up her 
glass), you'd better make it three. 



CURTAIN 



Unusually Good Entertainments 

Read One or More of These Before Deciding on 
Your Next Program 

A SURPRISE PARTY AT BRINKLEY'S. An En- 

tertainment in One Scene, by Ward Macauley. Seven male and 
seven female characters. Interior scene, or may be given with- 
out scenery. Costumes, modern. Time, one hour. By the 
author of the popular successes, "Graduation Day at Wood Hill 
School," "Back to the Country Store," etc. The villagers have 
planned a birthday surprise party for Mary Brinkley, recently 
graduated from college. They all join in jolly games, songs, 
conundrums, etc., and Mary becomes engaged, which surprises 
the surprisers. The entertainment is a sure success. 

JONES VS. JINKS. A Mock Trial in One Act, by 
Edward Mumford. Fifteen male a»d six female characters, with 
supernumeraries if desired. May be played all male. Many of the 
parts (members of the jury, etc.) are small. Scene, a simple 
interior ; may be played without scenery. Costumes, modern. 
Time of playing, one hour. This mock trial has many novel 
features, unusual characters and quick action. Nearly every 
character has a funny entrance and laughable lines. There are 
many rich parts, and fast fun throughout. 

THE SIGHT-SEEING CAR. A Comedy Sketch in One 
Act, by Ernest M. Gould. For seven males, two females, or 
may be all male. Parts may be doubled, with quick changes, so 
that four persons may play the sketch. Time, forty-five minutes. 
Simple street scene. Costumes, modern. The superintendent 
of a sight-seeing automobile engages two men to run the 
machine. A Jew, a farmer, a fat lady and other humorous 
characters give them all kinds of trouble. This is a regular gat- 
ling-gun stream of rollicking repartee. 

THE CASE OF SMYTHE VS. SMITH. An Original 
Mock Trial in One Act, by Frank Dumont. Eighteen males 
and two females, or may be all male. Plays about one hour. 
Scene, a county courtroom ; requires no scenery ; may be played 
in an ordinary hall. Costumes, modern. This entertainment is 
nearly perfect of its kind, and a sure success. It can be easily 
produced in any place or on any occasion, and provides almost 
any number of good parts. 

THE OLD MAIDS' ASSOCIATION. A Farcical Enter- 
tainment in One Act, by Louise Latham Wilson. For thirteen 
females and one male. The male part may be played by a 
female, and the number of characters increased to twenty or 
more. Time, forty minutes. The play requires neither scenery; 
nor properties, and very little in the way of costumes. Can' 
easily be prepared in one or two rehearsals. 

BARGAIN DAY AT BLOOMSTEIN'S. A Farcical 

Entertainment in One Act, by Edward Mumford. For five males 
and ten females, with supers. Interior scene. Costumes, mod- 
ern. Time, thirty minutes. The characters and the situations 
which arise from their endeavors to buy and sell make rapid-fire 
fun from start to finish. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



Unusually Good Entertainments 

Read One or More of These Before Deciding on 
Your Next Program 

GRADUATION DAY AT WOOD HILL SCHOOL. 

An Entertainment in Two Acts, by Ward Macauley. For six 
males and four females, with several minor parts. Time of 
playing, two hours. Modern costumes. Simple interior scenes; 
may be presented in a hall without scenery. The unusual conw 
bination of a real "entertainment," including music, recitations, 
etc., with an interesting love story. The graduation exercises 
include short speeches, recitations, songs, funny interruptions, 
and a comical speech by a country school trustee. 

EXAMINATION DAY AT WOOD HILL SCHOOL. 

An Entertainment in One Act, by Ward Macauley. Eight male 
and six female characters, with minor parts. Plays one hour. 
Scene, an easy interior, or may be given without scenery. Cos- 
tumes, modern. Miss Marks, the teacher, refuses to marry a 
trustee, who threatens to discharge her. The examination in- 
cludes recitations and songs, and brings out many funny answers 
to questions. At the close Robert Coleman, an old lover, claims 
the teacher. Very easy and very effective. 

BACK TO THE COUNTRY STORE. A Rural Enter- 
tainment in Three Acts, by Ward Macauley. For four male 
and five female characters, with some supers. Time, two hours. 
Two scenes, both easy interiors. Can be played effectively with- 
out scenery. Costumes, modern. All the principal parts are 
sure hits. Quigley Higginbotham, known as "Quig," a clerk in 
a country store, aspires to be a great author or singer and 
decides to try his fortunes in New York. The last scene is in 
Quig's home. He returns a failure but is offered a partnership 
in the country store. He pops the question in the midst of a 
surprise party given in his homor. Easy to do and very funny. 

THE DISTRICT CONVENTION. A Farcical Sketch 
in One Act, by Frank Dumont. For eleven males and one 
female, or twelve males. Any number of other parts or super- 
numeraries may be added. Plays forty-five minutes. No special 
scenery is required, and the costumes and properties are all 
easy. The play shows an uproarious political nominating con- 
vention. The climax comes when a woman's rights cham- 
pion, captures the convention. There is a great chance to bur- 
lesque modern politics and to work in local gags. Every 
part will make a hit. 

SI SLOCUM'S COUNTRY STORE. An Entertainment 
in One Act, by Frank Dumont. Eleven male and five female 
characters with supernumeraries. Several parts may be doubled. 
Plays one hour. Interior scene, or may be played without set 
scenery. Costumes, modern. The rehearsal for an entertain- 
ment in the village church gives plenty of opportunity for 
specialty work. A very jolly entertainment of the sort adapted 
to almost any place or occasion. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



Successful Plays for All Girls 

In Selecting Your Next Play Do Not Overlook This List 

YOUNG DOCTOR DEVINE. A Farce in Two Acts, 
by Mrs. E. J. H. Goodfellow. One of the most popular 
plays for girls. For nine female characters. Time in 
playing, thirty minutes. Scenery, ordinary interior. Mod- 
ern costumes. Girls in a boarding-school, learning that a 
young doctor is coming to^ vaccinate all the pupils, eagerly con- 
sult each other as to the .manner of fascinating the physician. 
When the doctor appears upon the scene the pupils discover that 
the physician is a female practitioner. 

SISTER MASONS. < A Burlesque in One Act, by Frank 
Dumont. For eleven females. Time, thirty minutes. Costumes, 
fantastic gowns, or dominoes. Scene, interior. A grand expose 
of Masonry. Some women profess to learn the secrets of a 
Masonic lodge by hearing their husbands talk in their sleep, 
and they institute a similar brganization. 

A COMMANDING' POSITION. A Farcical Enter- 
tainment, by Amelia Sa,nford. For seven female char- 
acters and ten or more other ladies and children. Time, one 
hour. Costumes, modern. Scenes, easy interiors and one street 
scene. Marian Young gets tired living with her aunt, Miss 
Skinflint. She decides to . "attain a commanding position." 
Marian tries hospital nursing, college settlement work and 
school teaching, but decides to go back to housework. 



HOW A WOMAN KEEPS A SECRET. A Comedy 
in One Act, by Frank Dumont. For ten female characters. 
Time, half an hour. Scene, an easy interior. Costumes, modern. 
Mabel Sweetly has just become engaged to Harold, but it's "the 
deepest kind of a secret." Before announcing it they must win 
the approval of Harold's uncle, now in Europe, or lose a possible 
ten thousand a year. At a tea Mabel meets her dearest friend. 
Maude sees Mabel has a secret, she coaxes and Mabel tells her. 
But Maude lets out the secret in a few minutes to another 
friend and so the secret travels. 

THE OXFORD AFFAIR. A Comedy in Three Acts, 
by Josephine H. Cobb and Jennie E. Paine. For eight female 
characters. Plays one hour and three-quarters. Scenes, inter- 
iors at a seaside hotel. Costumes, modern. The action of the 
play is located at a summer resort. Alice Graham, in order to 
chaperon herself, poses as a widow, and Miss Oxford first claims 
her as a sister-in-law, then denounces her. The onerous duties 
of Miss Oxford, who attempts to serve as chaperon to Miss 
Howe and Miss Ashton in the face of many obstacles, furnish 
an evening of rare enjoyment. 

THE PENN PUBLISHING COMPANY 

PHILADELPHIA 



i jiifi^im jffiNiifiliiii til ^ C0NGREss 

016 102 928 2 ^ 

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THE NATIONAL SCHOOL OF 
ELOCUTION AND ORATORY 

4012 Chestnut Street Philadelphia 



